Week 17 and 18 update

Hello everyone. I have had another good couple of
weeks. Since my last update I have only worked 2 ER
shifts. Both were busy, but the kind of busy that you
feel good about when it is over. You know that when
you go home that you helped people, worked hard,
didn’t complain and it was for a good cause. I know
that this will sound weird, but I feel that although I
have seen some horrible injuries the last month, I
haven’t had anyone die. What a strange world where
you decide whether you have had a good day or a bad
day based on the end of someone’s life. I am trying
not to get complacent as the end of my rotation draws
near. I have noticed that some people at the ER tend
to become calloused to what they are seeing especially
to the Iraqi patients. I have to watch what I say and
think sometimes so I don’t fall into that trap. Most
of these people are just civilians trying to survive
this situation and they get caught in the car bombs,
suicide bombers, snipers or injured by our forces by
accident. I try to treat them with respect.
Sometimes it is hard not to get frustrated. The
Iraqis really hate being exposed when we cut there
clothes off to find their injuries. I had a patient
who was shot in the face and his wife was shot in the
arm/shoulder and all he was worried about was his
pants being removed. Another woman came to our gate
in her Berka screaming that some Iraqi police beat her
and raped her but she refused to let the guards search
her and they let her into the ER. She refused to
cooperate with an exam in the ER, even by a female
doctor. She ended up getting a CT scan to see if she
was seriously injured and she had a an ammo belt on
with 3 cell phones strapped to her. The CT tech ran
to us and told what she saw. I loaded my pistol and
pointed it her head and the guards restrained her arms
and ripped the belt off and took it away. I stood
right there until they took her to the ward and
handcuffed her. The head ER doc was a little upset at
me, but he understood. If she had reached for
something I would have shot her. It was scary. If
that had been a real bomb, then we would have been
killed. The cultural difference has no business in
the ER or in a hospital that we are running in a war
zone.

The last shift I worked was really busy. I had to
intubate 2 patients because they were so shocky that
they couldn’t breathe on their own. I also started 2
central lines for blood and fluids. I was about to
start a chest tube, but the head trauma surgeon just
wanted a needle decompression of his chest and he got
the chest tube in the OR. The current surgical team,
especially their leadership is VERY difficult to work
with. I have to be careful what I say, because who
knows who is going to read this but I really almost
don’t care anymore. The first 3 months I worked very
independently in the ER and when I had the patients
resuscitated and stabilized the surgeons would get the
report and then go to the operating room. This is how
it normally works in the real world and most
hospitals. This current group of surgeons has let
themselves be corrupted by their leader. He is very
difficult to work with. He obviously does not like or
respect emergency physicians and treats us like techs.
He yells at everyone including fellow physicians and
tries to humiliate them and intimidate them. His
clinical judgment is often just plain wrong and
dangerous. The whole climate at the hospital has
become surgeons vs. the rest of the hospital.
Everyone is scared to do anything because he can pull
your credential and make your life miserable. The
hospital leadership either doesn’t know or is turning
a blind eye. It has become so unpleasant to work
there that most of the volunteers have quit and I have
thought about quitting myself. If it wasn’t for the
people that need help, I would quit and frankly I have
never backed down from a fight. I have also made some
good friends in the ER and I can’t abandon them.

Anyways, sorry to vent, but I guess that is what this
whole blog is for. I have done some other fun stuff.
I went to Qatar again for a couple of days and drank
the mandatory 3 beers. The pilot in command let me
sit up front for a while. I included some photos
below. I also got to go to the range today and shoot
several different weapons including my own M9, the
M-4, the MP-5 and the 1911. Afterwards, I went to the
outdoor pool and got some sun, cooked out with some
friends, and swam. So overall it was a good couple of
weeks and time is flying by.

I am starting to get really homesick. Little things
are starting to reminding me of the things I miss at
home like the little bit of green grass under my A/C
unit, the barbeque today and the sunburn. I try to
talk to my son Sean on the internet phone, but it is
hard since the delay confuses and frustrates him. I
really miss him. Denise, my wife is starting to get
worn down by him. Luckily my parents took him for 5
days to give her a break and get ready for our new
son, Ethan who is due in May. Also one of my best
friends, Melinda Lee is about to get married. She has
been at every one of my graduations and other special
occasions and has always been very supportive of me.
I am going to just miss her wedding and I feel
terrible about it. I am sure she understands, but it
still stinks. I was thinking the other day about some
of the things I have missed since I got here. I spent
my 34th birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s,
Valentine’s Day, and St Patrick’s Day. It is about to
be Easter and I will miss the Easter egg hunt. I got
kind of bummed out about it until I remembered that
most Army units stay 15 months and I thought about how
many things that they will miss. Also, I will get to
go home for 2 weeks to take some licensing exams and
for the birth of my son around May 7th. Also, I am at
a pretty comfortable base and have some good people to
hang out with here. After I remembered that, I quit
feeling sorry for myself. Perspective, remember…..

Anyway, I would like to say a special thank you to the
Janda family. They are my parent’s neighbors in
Bryan, Texas where I went to undergraduate at (Texas
A&M). Greg is fireman in College Station and a great
friend. We hang out all the time and drive around our
families land on 4-wheeler’s, go shooting, swim in the
various ponds, hunt deer, doves and pigs and sometimes
just sit under the trees and have a beer. His
parents, Iggie and Lorretta are great people and like
Melinda and my other friends, they have always been
very supportive and helpful. I received a package
yesterday from them and their daughters Paula and
Carol and their families. It was loaded with great
stuff. Right now I am wearing my Texas A&M hat,
sandals and eating the almonds they sent me. I am
also going to share some of the stuff with my unit.
Chapman’s Paint Company also sent some cool stuff and
deserve some recognition for their support as well.

I would also like to say thank you to my wife Denise.
This deployment hasn’t been easy on her and like other
military spouses, she is shouldering a great deal of
work while I am gone. She has also been great with
sending me care packages and things that I need from
home. This deployment has been tough on our
relationship but I hope that when I get home that I
will have learned some things that will make me more
patient and caring.

I also would like to thank all the people who have
read my blog and sent email or posted their comments.
All have been very supportive and have helped a great
deal. So again thank you to everyone and I can’t wait
to get home and hug my friends and family again.

See you soon, Aaron Buzzard

Flying to Qatar 1

Flying to Qatar 2

Qatar from 8,000 feet on approach

Mandatory Beers in Qatar

Shooting the M-4

Shooting the MP-5 from the hip

Shooting the MP-5 full auto